* All interviews have been edited and names and details have been altered to protect identities.

I’m Ali from Ghazni Provence, Afghanistan. I’m Hazara. I was a student in 2012 when I was kidnapped by the Taliban. During three days they beat me. After three days they got money from my mother. They put me in a car with closed eyes and roped hands and dropped me on the way. I got released and they threatened me.

“We didn’t kill you this time and make sure this is the last time. We let you live. If next time you don’t work for us we will kill you.”

After that I decided to leave Afghanistan. I came to Quetta of Pakistan in my relative’s home. I talked with a smuggler to come to Indonesia and then to Australia. I gave them thousands of dollars. I was In Pakistan for twenty days. I left Pakistan and I came to Indonesia on 8 August 2012. Then I talked with the smuggler to go to Australia. Four times I tried to go to Australia but I was arrested by police. I escaped each time. After the Australian politics was changed I decided to stay in Cisarua waiting for the UNHCR. After sixteen months I got refugee status from UNHCR. I hope to get resettled in Australia because I have some lovely Australian friends. Unfortunately I got refused by the Australian embassy in March 2015. It was really hard for me to get refused. Just God knows. My friends and I were really sad because I was waiting long time for Australia to get resettled but it did not happen to me. My Australian friends always give me the power to stay strong. Especially Lucy. I call her mum and Grace.

I am almost three years with unknown future and I don’t know how long I must wait. When will it end? During three years I got a lot of pain everyday waiting to hear good news with a lot of depression. I know many people here they are waiting three years. They get depression. I can’t sleep. Sometimes I use tablets to sleep. A lot of people in here need them.

* Ali is still waiting for resettlement.